The End of the Garden?

As the title says, I think that the idea of having a spring garden has fizzled. I was rearing some seedlings in the house for a month and now I've watched all of them die. My squashes died when I took them out of the jiffy greenhouse container they were in, some of my plants never even materialized, and then the other day I made a poor decision of thinking all of my tomato plants were old enough to go outside.

I put them out in a relatively sunny spot (Since tomatoes like sun, right?) on friday and at the end of the day I came back outside and they were all withered and bleached out. Every single one- even the purple tomatoes. So, I'm pretty sad about that because I was looking forward to growing them. But maybe it's a sign that school just doesn't allow time for proper care of plants.

Also, I had some garlic that had sprouted in the fridge and so I had planted that. Most of them I threw into the ground and they were doing fine, until my landladies husband came over and sprayed the backyard with weedkiller. He sprayed around some of them, but of course that stuff spreads like crazy and it's ridiculously toxic, so now all of the garlic has died or will die as well. It makes me upset, because I don't understand why my landlord can't have her grandkids come over and just pull the weeds out. That's what I've been doing a few times and I don't see any reason why people should just pump weedkiller into the ground when they can just do a little bit of work and pull them out naturally.

Watering won't help at this point!

So all I have left now are a few sunflowers and some lettuce, which is small and probably too bitter to eat. All of this is probably for the best not only because of school, but because I've injured my back somehow and it's not getting any better. So leaning over to take care of things would be too difficult and not the best idea.

Even though I'm still pretty sad and distressed over my portfolio review (as well as a handful of other things going wrong), there are some good things happening as well. I did my taxes and with the left over money I've bought some books and an SD card for my mp3 player so I can put most all of my music on it. I'm hoping that things will start to look a little brighter and not so "blah" in the next few weeks.

Conceptual Drivel and the Argument For What is Art

I know the title of this post is flame worthy, but you see that is exactly my point.

This morning I got ready and headed for my pre-portfolio review for my art program at school. I was fairly confident that whoever looked at my work would think it was pretty good. I had even heard that if they liked your stuff well enough then you could be accepted into the program on the spot.
Once I got there, I watched the three "directors" talk about what they wanted to see in the portfolio, and they even gave some examples of earlier portfolios submitted. One of the portfolios consisted of about 10 paintings. My program is considered more digital art than traditional, so I thought it was kind of strange that they would like the portfolio. Not only that, but the paintings were....to put it kindly, not very good. They consisted mostly of still lifes and one piece of a soldier with a caged bird. I thought it was rather cliche but they seemed to love it. I thought that if this is all that it took to get into the program then I should be all set. After all, I've already had my artwork published and some of the animation that I've worked on sold in stores.

One of the directors I had previously as a teacher and so we were told that we couldn't choose that same person to review our portfolio. So I chose to go with this one guy by the name of Greg to review my work. He seemed to be pretty popular with everyone and I figured that out of all 3, he was the highest in command and influence. As I waited for my turn to present my portfolio to him, I heard him make kind suggestions to the girl before me and he even told her that one of her pieces reminded him of Alexander Calder's work. The girl had no idea who Calder was, but told him that she would write it down. I thought to myself- how could you even make it this far without ever hearing of Alexander Calder? I shrugged it off and then it was my turn.

I showed him the first page and started explaining my work when he cut me off and told me that he would just look over it without me talking about it first. As he looked at each page he seemed rather uninterested and had this look of pity and confusion on his face. He reached the end and then told me: "I don't get any sense of who you are in any of these pieces. What is the point, the purpose? I don't see any ideas behind any of these." I was completely taken aback. He then asked me who I had taken my portfolio prep class with and I told him, and he looked in his direction and sort of sighed. I thought, "great! Now my teacher is going to get in trouble." My teacher had warned me that these other directors were big on concept-driven work, and so in a way I wasn't surprised at what he was asking me, but to write off all of my artwork was just ridiculous. The only kind thing he told me was that one of my life drawings was "technically okay." He could tell I was upset and then pushed his face closer to mine and said in this pitying voice: "do you understand what I'm asking you?" I said yes and but inside all I could think about was punching him in his smug face. He then got all happy and gave me my portfolio back and told me good luck on the final review.

That was the end and afterwards I really felt like crying, and even now I still do just to let off the steam. My frustration is borne out of the fact that these directors are focused more on conceptual driven art and they despise anything that is considered pop-surreal or low-brow. Plus, they have NO IDEA what kind of artists companies in animation, and game design want. They don't have a clue because they have never worked in those industries. Greg was telling the girl before me about an artist who took pictures of 60 peoples bellybuttons and how fascinating it was. These are the kinds of artists who are more excited about you pooping in a basket while cutting your hair off and gluing it back on to your naked body, than work that would be produced by a famous concept artist like Feng Zhu. My teacher told me that one artist they have been gushing over is Jason Salavon. We looked at some of his work in class and basically all he does is take a bunch of photographs, lower then to a certain amount of opacity and then layer them one on top of each other, resulting in a ghost-like image. Anybody with photoshop (you probably don't even need that) could do that simply enough. Besides, the idea isn't even original.

So which is "Art"? This:

As Salavons website explains:

Every Playboy Centerfold, The Decades (normalized)   2002

Digital C-prints.

From a broader series begun in 1997, the photographs in this suite are the result of mean averaging every Playboy centerfold foldout for the four decades beginning Jan. 1960 through Dec. 1999. This tracks, en masse, the evolution of this form of portraiture.

Or This:

Or maybe this:

Homes for Sale   1999/2001/2002

Digital C-print.

From a series begun in 1997, the prints in this suite are the result of mean averaging a specific number of realtor photos of single-family homes for sale. Each piece encompasses homes on the market in a given metro region in the median price range for that area.

VS. This:

Frankly I think that the people who are in charge of my program have extremely biased, close-minded, dated and skewed views of what they consider "good" art to be.  I firmly believe that much of what is considered low brow art now, will one day be extremely admired. These people seem to believe that if your art doesn't hang in galleries, and it's not controversial, then it's not art. Ultimately they show no signs of having any interest whatsoever in "working class art," art that is used by companies and the industry. Although contemporary "modern" art from the likes of Damien Hirst bring in a ton of money at auction, what about the artists that don't care about the fortune and fame? Are they not considered succesful, influential artists because they aren't making their work super conceptual?

I think that the kinds of artists they like may have some power in the fine art industry, but when it comes to influencing a new young generation, they fall flat. How many teenagers do you meet that love to draw and paint and want to be exactly like Jason Salavon? And how many teenagers would want to be a manga, comic book artist or animator? Truth be told, I don't like to encourage teenagers to draw manga without first observing the basics, but the simple fact is that while people may find manga to be stupid, silly, ugly and cookie cutter....it really has influenced a tremendous amount of young artists today in ways that high profile contemporary artists haven't. That's what I think is important, influence and not money sales.

Now I think that maybe if I put in my worst work, that they'll like it better than what I have in there now. If I make up some ridiculous story to put behind my work and give them what they want to hear then I'm sure I could lead them along and they would fall for it. I'm really tempted to make a piece now that includes several shots of Greg's head, in 20% opacity superimposed on top of one another, projecting on a cracked wall in red, while almost inconspicuous violin music plays in the background- all with a brazilian shaman sitting in a pile of soiled oily rags chanting loud spiritual incantations meant to ward off the devil. I know they would love it. It's not who I am, but it's what THEY WANT to see, right? And that's all that matters to them.
After my review I headed over to the art building to continue on a painting for one of my classes. I had been frustrated all throughout the week that I couldn't get the colors to look the way I wanted and I was hoping that today would bring some sort of breakthrough. But I still had no luck and eventually gave up. I know why my colors aren't turning out correctly and in class I become very frustrated while working on it. My teacher doesn't seem to understand what I'm struggling with but it's really quite obvious to myself. The problem is that I've never intensely studied color theory. Of course in high school I would make the classic required color wheel and do a few color mixing exercises. But it wasn't enough, and none of that information has ever sunk in. Pretty much all that I know is that red and blue make purple, yellow and blue make green, etc. But beyond the basics, I have NO idea what I'm doing. Because of this, I can see the color of my subject, but I have no idea how to recreate it, or create contrast and proper shadows. This deficiency coupled with never having painted in oils has reduced me to a state of extreme doubt in my abilities. I just can't seem to grasp oil painting....I've really only ever used acrylics, and they seem to suite me so well. I've wanted to paint with oil, but I just don't understand the process of working with it. It doesn't help that I still have the feeling that I have no idea what I'm doing when I clean my pallet, try to keep my hands clean and my brushes. The darned stuff gets everywhere and I'm paranoid of using all the turps and getting stuff on me.

Oy, that was a long paragraph, but today I've just been really humbled. Not to say I wasn't humble before. I think I'm actually pretty modest about my abilities. Probably too modest. But the painting problem has humbled me and the portfolio problem has confirmed that yes, I do need to find out what my work is all about, but also that the people in charge of the portfolios are a bunch of punks.

After heading to the library to try to find a crash course book on color and almost falling asleep there, I headed home. I caught the bus immediately, but on the next stop it broke down. I was about a mile and a half away from my house, so I decided to walk since it was a nice day. As I was walking I thought of Supertramps song, "long way home"and I sang it a little bit in my head as I walked. The walk wasn't too bad and I saw a lot of interesting things. As I got closer to my house one of my neighbors had the radio on and just as I was walking past, Supertramps song came on. It seemed like all of this had been planned.

When I got home, a letter from my little sister was waiting for me. I opened it up and it contained another envelope. I opened that and inside there was no letter....it was just tissues. Yes, facial tissues with an image of a lichtenstein-esque woman printed on them and she was crying. After this, I had a feeling that maybe this day really was all planned out, and for some kind of reason, although I'm not sure what. I haven't started crying over my wretched day yet, but those tissues really will come in handy if I do.

Brooklyn Industries shirt!!

I want this T-shirt from Brooklyn Industries! I know it might be a little plain, but I think the color would look really good on me. But is 35 dollars too much?

More posts to come later!

Cute Video!

I have a few ideas I'd like to blog about, but I haven't been finding the time lately. Soooo here is one video that I found on the internet that I think is pretty cool. It's an artist that paints realistic goldfish.



I want to learn how to do that!

Shoes, Shoes, Shoes!

Well I think I've found a new time to blog! I'm going to be working Saturdays now, and so far it appears that they may not be all that busy. So I'm trying to find things to do, and yes- I did bring my sketchbook to work so that I can get some drawing/creative time in.

But because all I have to do at work is sit in front of the computer, I've been looking at some of the things that Asos has on their website. Asos is pretty much my new favorite place to find cool shoes. Although I certainly can't afford to buy most of what I see. So here is my bored shameless shoe post!

First off, I really like these shoes and I kind of want to get them. They are about 45 dollars I think. I love the see-thru lace!



They also come in creme, but I'm not sure which is better and I'm kind of leaning toward black. What do you think?



I really like the colors and desgin of this shoe. It's so cute!

This shoe is a little 80's, but I'm still really digging it.

This shoe looks playful and fun!

Totally love metallic leopard print!

Words can't even express how cute this shoe is!

Okay, the interesting thing about this shoe is that I actually own it, but not in orange. I have it in grey suede and purple. I bought them at TJMaxx for about a third of the price that Asos is selling these for. It's interesting when you see a pair of shoes that you own on a website because sometimes they look completely different. In real life, these shoes have a super high arch. But looking at them in this picture it really doesn't seem like it.

How cute are these? They are velvet with bows! like little slippers. SOOO cute.

Side view!

Of course I had to throw in a few dresses. 

I like this. apparently I really like color blocking.

I SO wanted this dress but when I discovered it, they didn't have my size and probably still don't. I wish I could have it.

This dress is sort of cute. I guess I'm more attracted to the cut and fit of it than anything else. It probably wouldn't look that great on me in this color combination, but it certainly looks good on the model!

I also really like these Vince Camuto shoes at Dillards. I love metallic accents!

 Okay, well that's enough for now. If I had pictures of my plants then I would blog about those as well, but I don't. The temperature is still in the 70's and I can tell you that the two sunflowers seeds that were moms have sprung up already. So have my 2 zucchinis. I might actually plant more of both, though. I'm eagerly awaiting for my purple tomatoes to come up, but no sign of them yet!

New Beginnings for 2012!

The new year is here and I've been thinking about what 2012 has in store for me. I've never really been one to make resolutions, although I think I might try a few this year. I always end up breaking them so I gave up a long time ago.

Although November was very cold in Arizona (about 45-50 degrees during the day), December has been the opposite. The beginning of December was about 60 degrees every day and I figured it was the perfect time and temperature to try and grow some lettuce again. I planted some about a week ago, but since then the temperature has gone up more- to about 75 degrees during the day now. I'm not sure what the weather change will do to them and I'm also not sure if the we will have another cold snap.

To protect the seedlings, I thought I would try planting them in my Jiffy seedling tray, and I figured at the time since it was colder, that they would enjoy the warmth of the tray. However, now I think it might be too hot for them after all, because only one has sprouted. I also planted some in regular trays and left them outside. Those have been doing much better and nearly all of them have sprouted.

The Jiffy Seedling Tray. I have some metal stakes holding the lid on.   

Only one little sprout in the Jiffy Tray. It has become way too hot inside for them!

Meanwhile, the 'outside' lettuces have begun to sprout and appear to be doing well.

I'm really excited that the lettuce has sprouted in only a week! (And that it even sprouted at all). As soon as I saw the sprouts I became very excited and began to plant a bunch more seeds. Some of these seeds I acquired from my moms collection when I went home last year. I'm very excited about them. (Can you tell I'm excited yet?)

Yay for new seeds!

Now I have a whole bunch outside. Currently planted:

• Various colors of zinnias. I obtained the seeds from my mom.
• Marigolds - from mom.
• Lettuce, as I have mentioned. I planted "Caesar's Favorite," "Red and Green Romaine Blend," and "Mesclun- Gourmet Greens Mixture."
• Attempted some Lavender seeds again.
• 2 Mammoth Russian sunflower seeds (these are the kind I grew last year) as well as 2 Giant Gray Striped Sunflowers (from mom's garden).
• 2 Crimson Sweet Watermelons
• 2 white pumpkins for fun. (I think I'm actually supposed to plant them for fall, but oh well! =)
• zucchini (oh no!! not again!! but I have to plant zucchini just because its so simple to grow!)
• yellow (summer) squash. I tried to buy and grow yellow squash last year, but in both cases the plant died. I may as well try again, though.
• Large Fruited Cherry tomatoes- the kind that grew super-duper tall last year.
  
  Last but not least, I have planted 4 new seedlings. These seeds are very special. Why you may ask? Well because they are Blue Tomatoes!! Actually, I prefer to call them purple because they look more purple than blue. But apparently these special tomatoes were developed at Oregon State University, and it was only 2.99 for a pack and so I had to get some! One blogger says this:
  
  "This experimental blue tomato (sometimes going by the name P20) is being produced by Oregon State University in an attempt to create an uber-healthy tomato with a high level anthocyanin, the powerful antioxidant found in blueberries."

As you can see in this picture, I received the pack of seeds from Solana Seed Company, as well as a baggie of homegrown popping corn from mom. I've popped some of the corn already and it is terrific! (LOL, I almost typed pooped instead of popped!)



THIS IS NOT MY PICTURE, but the Blue Tomatoes should look something like this when they are full grown.



I'm not sure what they will taste like. Others have said they are pretty good. But I don't care much. I just want blue tomatoes, baby!

Also, while cleaning out the fridge, I found several cloves of garlic that were sprouting. I figured I might as well try and grow them instead of just throwing them away, so I planted one in my old marigold pot and a bunch of others in the regular sandy/clay soil ground. The one in the pot is doing the best so far.

I don't know anything about growing Garlic, so this should be interesting.

The garden, aka grave is being prepped!

Things I've been thinking about: I've been thinking about where I will plant things this season, and I think I'm going to move things around a bit. I learned my lesson last time about planting my zucchini in my garden. It immediately crowded out the eggplants. This time I think I'll plant the zucchini away from the garden and actually near the patio. That way the zucchini will have plenty of space to grow, full sun and plus when we look outside we will see some greenery and not just dirt.

• I think I might try to grow a few herbs- but I'll probably buy them from Lowe's.
• I'm not going to grow eggplants again, because I just don't know what to do with them!
• I'm going to try and figure out a good way to water my plants easily. Yes, I do have the drip/spray hoses, but my plants did so much better when I watered them by hand, especially the tomatoes. Time is a huge factor, since I know I'll be busy with classes. but I think that I will try to water everything by hand as much as possible. So maybe I should dig some kind of water trench or something.
• I don't know if I should grow a lot of sunflowers or just a few. After all, some of them didn't even grow that tall...so maybe I'll grow a lot and plant them elsewhere? Who knows.
• I'm nervous about the watermelons and pumpkins. Those will be entirely new to me.
• I'm hoping that my seeds have been started early enough. Last time I planted in February I think. If the seeds will grow earlier, I think I can avoid the pests that I encountered late in the season last year. (like squash bugs)

Well thats all for now. Later!

All I Want for Christmas

I've been compiling my christmas wishlist. Here are a few of the things I wish I could have!

I want this Liz Claiborne dress from JCPenneys! Tried it on in the store and it looks much better in real life than it does in this picture. It's super cute and feminine. Since the store didn't have my size I'd have to buy it online, although they've been changing the online price of it constantly. The other day it was like 49 and today its 59. So annoying.

I want these dolce vita boots! On sale from 200 down to 119. They only have size 8.5 left, whcih means if I want them I better order them now because they are selling out. Another problem is I don't really have anywhere to wear them (especially now that I no longer live in NYC). I suppose I could wear them around, although I've never been someone who wears high heels out shopping. BUT I could wear them to art shows.




I want this book! Not much to see here, yes it is a boring cover.



This little kit. Don't be fooled! It comes with a miniature anatomically correct skeleton which is useful for anatomy studies. Several artists have recommended it.



This book is sold by the Met and I got to take a peek inside of it. It has a bunch of drawings, which are amazing to look at.



This book has a ton of examples of fabric prints, which would be very useful for me.



I need a new camera! My camera is about 6-7 years old and I can't even buy the battery pack or SD cards for it anymore. This is a picture of the HD Hero 2 camera, which is actually mainly used for outdoor filming, but I wouldn't mind having it for everyday use. It's only 299.00 which is a far cry from the other camera I want, a Canon 5D which is thousands. Oh, wishful thinking!



Here is another book that would be fun to have.

All of these books are really only the tip of the iceberg. there are a ton of figure drawings and anatomy books I want, plus music CD's. If only I were rich!